alwaysunqualified

  “Last time on—” she began, but I cut her off sharply. “Just stop!”

  “Oh, come on, I thought you'd rexed a bit after living here,” she said, and I could somehow see her tilting her head to one side, her mouth slightly open and her eyes rolling away from me.

  “I was rexed before you dragged me here!” I yelled. My home, my concerns, everything I thought I had moved past surged back into my mind. ‘No, I need to calm down.’

  “That was like 12 years ago, let it go already,” she said dismissively, ignoring my near panic attack.

  No, calming down was impossible with her around. I could only hope that achieving my life goal might help. "Can you show yourself?"

  “No, no, any punching and kicking will have to wait for ter when we're in the bedroom,” she replied, her voice filled with excitement.

  "Ha," I exhaled, feeling defeated and exhausted, longing just to return home and curl up in bed with my family. "Why are you here, anyway?"

  "Just check your level 25 skill," she prompted. At her words, my skill information appeared.

  [Goddess Call-In: Allows you to talk to the Goddess of Love twice a year.]

  I'm suddenly regretting ever leveling up.

  “Shouldn't you be doing, I don't know goddess stuff?” I ask hoping that she will just go away. In my mind, when I imagined seeing her again, I thought I would bitch her out or even threaten her. But now that it's actually happening, all I really want is for her to leave me alone. Punching her too, but since that's not an option, I'll settle for her just going away.

  “I am. I'm watching you on my second monitor,” she replied, and suddenly I could hear the sound of clicking. I had so many questions, none of which I felt like asking.

  “Not that you're second monitor material, but I have a few trillion other things to focus on. I make sure to switch to you when you're doing something entertaining,” she continued, adding to the amount of my questions.

  “Can you just go away?” I tried to be more direct this time, with no real expectation of it working.

  “Sure, don't mind me.” She began whistling a tune to herself as the clicking persisted.

  I chose the cool guy option again and exited the stage. I was led to a participant's room where I could watch the rest of the tournament. I couldn’t enjoy it; I can't even really recall what was happening between my creeping dread and this stupid fucking goddess.

  You know that person who yells at movies? Turns out this goddess is that person. She screamed and cheered throughout the tournament, making inappropriate comments. I have a feeling she and Miki would get along.

  “There will be plenty of time for a threesome ter,” she remarked, proving she would indeed get along well with her.

  I spent the rest of my time trying to strategize how to defeat each winner, but I didn't make much progress because of her distractions. I'm thankful I did some preparation st night, or else I'd feel completely unprepared. The tournament showcased some impressive abilities, and there were a few surprising upsets where the underdog triumphed. We had also discussed tactics for those potential winners.

  “We'll have to save the details for between chapters,” she blurted out, reminding me of her presence just as I was beginning to immerse myself in the matches.

  “What are you talking about? Wait, are you turning my life into a book?” It took a moment for her words to sink in.

  “Among other things, yes,” she replied. I then noticed a book with her on the cover, pyfully sticking out her tongue.

  “At least the day is almost over, and I won't have to hear from her again for a while,” I said, gazing at the darkening sky. I was just eager to see my family again. Tempted to just get up and leave, I was reminded by the staff that leaving would mean disqualification, and the future points were just barely worth it to keep me from walking out.

  “Don't worry, I'll call in again tomorrow. Why do you think I made this two uses?” she teased, as if I would actually miss her presence.

  “Why not do something useful and let me choose the date target?” I snapped back. Even knowing I could increase the odds of getting someone I wanted, the whole process was still a headache.

  “Sorry, nothing I can do there; can't break our rules,” she replied, giving me a shrug with her hands raised to shoulder height, slowly shaking her head as if she truly were powerless.

  “What rules are those?” I asked her, no longer trying to figure out how I could see her without her being physically present.

  “Even if I could tell you, it would take just under 4 billion years, and nobody wants to sit through that,” she pointed out.

  “I’m going home,” I announced, seeing that the st winner had finally been decided. However, I still had to wait for the organizer, and at the end of the matches, they detailed the future events. I thought it would be just a match breakdown, but apparently, there was a dinner afterward for all the winners. It was specially arranged to ensure we were at maximum efficiency for tomorrow. Probably, the real reason was so that the noble houses could meet us.

  Turns out my family had been informed and had given their consent, but no one thought it was important to let me know. I hate being treated like a kid. So, I wasn’t going home after all. I really wished they had just said no, but I knew they were trying to help me encounter the princess, so it was hard to be mad.

  Tomorrow morning, we would be brought back here and go to the stage where I would have the first crack at everyone. I would start with the tier 1 winner and fight down the line until I lost. The winner of the whole thing would have a chance to fight matches against interested nobles. Next, delegates from other races would have their chance to fight. The st one in the ring at the end of the king-of-the-hill contest would be the winner.

  From the way she said it, no one expected me to win. Then again, all anyone had seen were my weaker cards, which anyone here could beat.

  Take the winner of tier 1: a girl with superstrength and durability. She would have effortlessly withstood Sakura's opening move, shattered Angelica's barriers, and pummeled Izzy before I could heal. Both Sakura and Angelica might have stood a chance, but it would have been a grueling fight. When you compare the real capabilities of Sakura and Angelica to my own dispyed abilities, I seem like a cheap copy.

  The winner of tier 2 was even more Fearsome. She effortlessly countered the damage reflection of the girl who defeated Sakura in the top eight. Utilizing her space Blessing, she dismembered her opponent, tearing off her arms and legs while keeping her own limbs intact, allowing her natural recovery to heal any injuries. The incapacitated girl was held on the ground, helpless and bleeding out until she succumbed to blood loss.

  ‘And Miki’s card would kill them with one breath,’ I thought. I would merely breathe on the first girl, while for the second, I could use Miki’s viper poison, which would instantly dissolve her head. In some ways, Miki’s Blessing is even deadlier in my hands than in her own. Unlike her, I have no limit on the amount of poison I can expel, even if I am slower in deploying it.

  Soon enough, a coordinator entered our viewing room, followed by another girl cd in a sheer white cloak with her hood drawn up. Much like the princess, her face was concealed, revealing only white nipples and long white fingernails clutching a staff of the same pristine white. Considering the rest of her body was obscured, there must be a reason she chose to reveal them.

  “Would you like me to delve into the deep and complex history of breast milk and how it has influenced the world today?” Her question abruptly reminded me of memories from my youth I would rather forget. I shook the thought away; it wasn't important anyway.

  With a tap of her staff on the ground, we were instantly transported to another room.

  The room, filled with grand, shifting images of ancient tales, some familiar to me, I felt slightly underdressed in just scks and a t-shirt. However, clothing in this world was a form of expression. People didn't dress up for events; they dressed to reflect their identities or beliefs.

  I never quite understood it, but mom expined that dressing for an occasion could be seen as insulting here.

  Awaiting us were individuals whom I would normally refer to as maids, but such a term here could offend the goddess of submission and everyone present. So, I decided to call them attendants.

  “I know, right? She's so picky. Give a girl one doujinshi and suddenly she thinks she owns the entire genre.” A series of images from various books featuring maids as the main girl fshed through my mind, and I suddenly realized that doujinshi's were essentially cartoon porn.

  “Wow, you just managed to insult so many people,” she said, giving me a look that screamed, 'I don't know this guy; we definitely didn't come here together.'

  “You're still here?” I said, annoyed to be reminded of her presence just as I'd managed to forget about her.

  "Yeah, it's not midnight yet," she replied in a condescending tone, as if I was stupid. “Oh, take this one back with you. She can vibrate her vagina with her blessing. Oh, and her, she has a split tongue. We need one of those. Her too, she likes to use her feet.”

  I continued to do my best to ignore her as the staff led us onward, but her barrage of odd comments made it difficult. Inevitably, I ended up learning something about every single girl, and apparently, she wanted them all.

  "Silva is a married woman! Don't even think about it, you sicko," she snapped, giving me a look of absolute disgust as if I were the one at fault. "The rest of them are A-OK, though. Make sure to bring them all back. You'll need some staff soon anyway, so you might as well start recruiting now. Plus, vibrating vagina."

  “I don’t care about her fucking vibrating vagina!” I spoke far too loudly, drawing the attention of everyone in the room. The girl in question gave me a slightly embarrassed look, accompanied by a surge of affection points.

  “Um, well yes it does. It feels like a nice, soothing deep massage at my core. But this is really not the time to discuss this. If you are interested, you can inquire ter.” With that professional response, she ushered us forward, leading us into a garden-like area brimming with colorful flowers, statues, and images that floated through the air.

  The area was dotted with tables den with food, the aromas so tantalizing I could almost taste them from where I stood. We were guided to a separate table set aside for each of us. Across from us stood a multitude of girls, perhaps a few hundred, clustered into their own little cliques. All the girls were dressed more fully than I was accustomed to; they wouldn’t have been out of pce in my world except for their vibrant attire. It seemed as if someone had asked them which color they wanted to wear, and they had answered "yes." Each girl was adorned in every conceivable shade of the rainbow.

  Trying to take in all the colors was actually straining my eyes.

  Once we were all seated, a girl stood up, causing the other girls to quiet down. She wore a dress that shimmered in all the colors of the rainbow, trailing a couple of feet behind her on the floor. Orbiting above her head were stones primarily red, yellow, and blue.

  [Name: Seren Vowkeeper Level: ??? Affection: [Already taken] House: Vowkeeper 6th wifeSeren is the guardian of her house’s ancient library, which contains books of forgotten lore. She is one of the few who understands these texts, using the knowledge to advise her queen and protect her nds.]

  [Vowkeeper - A founding member of the city, responsible for establishing the contracts that the city uses to function.]

  "Ladies and Sirs, esteemed guests, and valiant competitors," she began, her voice carrying clearly across the garden.

  “It is with great honor and privilege that I stand before you today, amidst the echoes of a tournament that will be etched in the annals of our beloved city’s history. As we gather in the spirit of camaraderie and celebration, let us first commend the extraordinary dispy of strength and valor that each contestant has shown. Your performances today were not just a testament to your personal prowess, but a beacon of inspiration to all who watched with bated breath.” As she spoke, her gaze shifted among us, but it felt as if her eyes never left me, making me feel like the focal point of her speech.

  “Today, you have done more than compete; you have represented the very essence of our city and its enduring strength. Each use of your Blessing, each strategic maneuver, has mirrored the enduring heart of our home, allowing the twenty-four to smile down on us. In doing so, you have woven yourselves into the fabric of our city’s legacy, a legacy that will be recalled for ages to come.” As she spoke, I could see the audience watching my fights with fervor, and the goddesses above admiring my resilience.

  “As we look to the future, remember, you are the heralds of tomorrow, the vanguard of our city's prosperity. Your strength secures our borders, your courage inspires our people, and your honor upholds the values we cherish dearly.“ The more she spoke, the more captivated I became. I felt proud to be a citizen of this city, proud that I could use my strength to keep the people here safe, repaying them for their support in my time of need.

  “And now, in the spirit of unity and joy, under the guidance of our Goddesses, I invite the noble dies in waiting, those graceful pilrs of our court, to step forward. Interact with our champions, celebrate their triumphs, and may your conversations spark friendships that strengthen the bonds of our city.” She concluded her speech with a slight curtsy. I could deeply feel her sincerity, her care, her concern, and her trust that we would guide this city into the future.

  “Ma, I give her a four for trying. Really, she does a much better job between her sisters legs, that I will give an eight,” the goddess remarked, and just like that, it all came crashing down. The rge group of girls began moving forward in an impressively organized manner, dispersing to different tables.

  Contrary to my expectations, a group of girls quickly congregated at my table, led by a blonde-haired girl sporting a rainbow-painted angel wing on the right side of her body. She was accompanied by seven other girls, who appeared to be divided into two smaller groups. It wasn't clear who led the second group, but watching them approach felt like a fshback to high school.

  “Wow, you actually noticed that,” I heard what sounded like a bag being shaken. “Too bad that was the st miracle for today. I'll have to order more.”

  The dies sat down across from me with a grace that was difficult to pinpoint; their movements were clean, clear, and precise.

  The one-winged girl sat directly across from me, and once the others were settled, she began, "Hello Liev Ekker, I am Aria Vowkeeper of House Vowkeeper. This is Melody Goldweave from…

  She introduced each of them in turn. Each introduction seemed to take minutes, and during this time, I remembered to check my map for the princess's location. Realizing she was still not here, I decided to start eating after a short prayer, only half-listening to their introductions. I really wished there was a way to speed up time so that their speech would flow at a normal pace; perhaps even a four-times speed would be necessary with the way this was dragging on.

  “Hello,” I replied nonchantly, not particurly keen on getting to know them. The Trailbzers might speak highly of the nobles, but from what I could tell, delving deeper into retionships with them seemed more trouble than it was worth. For now, I decided to stick to a neutral path.

  I thought I would be left alone, given that I was the weakest, but I had forgotten that I was also the only male. Noble houses value strength above all, a commonality in other cities as well. Nobles don't keep their sons; any boy is given away at birth. If he ter becomes strong enough to marry into a noble house, the house that gave him away has the first cim, at least according to Lamya the librarian.

  Daughters are only allowed to marry a man who has proven his strength. Upon marriage, one of his wives assumes leadership of the house. And the man? What do you think one would do with his time if he had over a hundred wives?

  The girl across from me sat there, studying me as if I were an animal in a zoo, so I decided to ignore her and piled more food onto my pte.

  "You have a copycat ability," she began, just as my spoon cttered against the food, clearly intent on derailing my efforts to enjoy my meal.

  “Yep,” I answered simply.

  “From the Goddess of Love,” she noted, her tone matching my ck of enthusiasm.

  “Yep,” I continued, recognizing that she seemed like a smart girl who could take a hint.

  "Managed to trade blows with a tier 6 void monster by copying your mom's abilities," she said, and I need to swallow my food, having plenty of time to dig in.

  "Yep," I responded, meeting her gaze as we both settled into silence.

  …

  …

  “This is a waste of time, we have more pressing affairs to attend to than wasting time with an insignificant kid,” she finally decred to her group, completely dismissing me.

  “But the—” one of the girls started, only to be cut off. “Our pledge is to the city, we are leaving.”

  She stormed off, or at least that was the closest description given the grace with which she moved, and I was left with seven girls. Three of them also offered long-winded goodbyes before departing. Finally, the remaining four began to rise as well.

  “Um, may fate favor you,” one of the girls said before leaving, casting me a rather complex look.

  “Really, Sie?” The girl next to her seemed to admonish her.

  “Oh, um, sorry…” She bowed to me and then they also left—not just my table, but the party altogether. I received some strange looks, but the other girls stayed where they were and continued with their activities.

  'That was weird,' I thought to myself, but soon shrugged it off as I helped myself to another serving.

  "Man, she really has the wrong image of the current you," the goddess commented, chewing loudly. "They do say that love is blind, but this might be taking it a bit too far." She continued, though even her comments couldn't dampen my enjoyment of the meal. "And that girl..."

  The goddess paused ominously, as if she had something profound to reveal. “...Isn't her wing just perfect for a wing job? I mean, she has the perfect softness to keep you right on edge “

  “Yep, complete waste of time,” I muttered, finally able to enjoy the food now that the distractions were gone. I must admit, it was the best food I had ever tasted. I probably looked like a pig, stuffing it into my mouth. Even the goddess eventually left me alone. When the party started to wind down, the staff actually had to help me walk to my rest area. I flopped onto the bed in a great mood. It even occurred to me that I hadn’t managed to ask the goddess any of the questions I had.

  “Don't worry, you can ask now,” she said, as if she had been waiting for this precise moment.

  “Oh God, not again.” And just like that, my good mood evaporated. Why didn’t I just go to sleep?