Zack Adder stepped into the street as the crossing signal winked on, separating from the crowd going the other way.

  For the first time in his life Zack Adder was free. He walked down the street not invisible, but anonymous. All the automatic facial recognition programs had his face linked to a dummy identity. He didn’t carry a cell phone. He was tracker-free.

  He was on his way to a job interview.

  A wonderfully normal job, at the local veterinary clinic. They needed someone who could manage IT, run the front desk, and could deal with animals. Mainly cats and dogs, but also snakes, rodents, and birds on occasion.

  Zack liked all kinds of animals, though he didn’t understand why someone would keep a spider as a pet.

  That Dr. Valentine was gorgeous, and only a few years older than him, was a big part of why he was taking the job.

  Zack was twenty-two and had his whole life ahead of him and a duffel-bag full of cash under his bed in his new downtown apartment. There was nothing stopping him from living a normal, honest life.

  “Look out!”

  A shout pulled Zack out of his wool-gathering.

  A young man, a teen perhaps, with a high-school varsity jacket on and a quarterback’s build rushed toward Zack.

  His hand flew to his hip, finding it empty.

  “Move!” the blonde-haired, blue-eyed man yelled.

  Zack turned.

  A truck was barreling towards him, light on the windshield obscuring the driver.

  There was no time.

  The truck was on them both in an instant.

  The younger man tackled him.

  The truck’s grille smashed into them both.

  Bones crunched.

  And Zack’s last thoughts on Earth were…

  How?

  Had he made a mistake?

  He should have gotten away clean.

  There was no way this could just be an accident…

  Crash!

  The truck slammed into the side of a building, pinning the lifeless bodies between.

  Rain began to fall, washing away the blood as onlookers screamed; and in the distance, sirens wailed.

  So ended the Earthly lives of Zack Adder and Bradley Northcourt.

  ***

  You can imagine Zack’s surprise to find himself conscious, standing in a vast marble hall before an old man with flowing white hair and beard seated on a throne.

  Buck naked.

  Shameless, Zack folded his arms across his chest.

  He worked out and was in good shape. He had nothing to feel ashamed of.

  The old man looked him up and down, and his gaze lingered.

  “Ahem, my eyes are up here,” Zack quipped, and cocked an eyebrow.

  The old man met his gaze and raised an eyebrow of his own.

  “So they are. Welcome, Mr. Zack Adder, to the afterlife.”

  Zack sighed. He had been afraid of that.

  “So, God is real, huh?”

  “Indeed.”

  “And you’re gonna judge me for my sins, huh?”

  “Well, no.”

  Zack paused.

  Wasn’t that what God was supposed to do?

  “Actually, I have a job for you.”

  The way God said ‘job’ was exactly how his handlers had said it.

  All his handlers, no matter who they worked for and where they were from—they all said ‘job’ the same way.

  Zack narrowed his eyes and frowned.

  “Oh, don’t be like that.”

  “I quit that life.”

  He had worked quite hard to quit that life.

  He was tired of all the lying.

  God ignored him.

  “You see, I need the world’s best spy—”

  “I’m not the world’s best spy.”

  Zack would know. In fact, of anyone else on Earth, he was the only one who would know.

  The IT admin sees and knows all.

  “Perhaps not the best spy, but you were the spy who got away.”

  It was then that it hit him.

  He was dead.

  The past tense was like a slap across the face.

  What had his life amounted to?

  Everything he had built up, he had torn down with his own hands.

  He had just been about to start living.

  It was literally his first day out of the game!

  He sighed deeply, pinching the bridge of his nose.

  What had it all been for?

  Apparently, nothing.

  “Shall I tell you the job, now?”

  Zack performed a sharp about-face, turning around…

  To find himself facing the same old man on his throne.

  His hands fell to his sides and he looked over his shoulder at the empty hall behind him.

  “Do I have a choice?”

  “You always have a choice, Zack.”

  Zack couldn’t help but snort.

  He’d heard that one before.

  He could do it now, or he could do it later.

  His dad had been fond of that one, before the accident. Do it now, or do it after a whoopin’.

  And so, Zack Adder slipped back into his old habits.

  “What’s in it for me?” Zack asked. “And anyway, what kinda job can I even do, being dead and all.”

  “Well, to answer both: I’m going to send you to another world.”

  “A what?”

  “Another world. It’s like Earth, but a bit more primitive. You’ll do splendidly over there.”

  “That’s not enough.”

  “Eh?”

  “I wanted out. I was just about to start my real life. I do this one job for you, I want to be out for good.”

  “Certainly, young man.” God smiled with a twinkle in his eye at the precocious mortal.

  “And another thing.”

  God frowned.

  “I want a favor.”

  God sighed. “You’re asking for a blank check?”

  “Yeah.”

  There was nothing more sacrosanct than favors in the world of spies and secret agents. They were more valuable than life and death, by far.

  More than half the trouble of disappearing had been arranging to rid himself of favors owed.

  God closed his eyes, and an eternity passed in but a moment.

  “Fine. One favor of your choosing, at the time of your choosing, but only after you finish the job.”

  Zack Adder nodded.

  “Deal.”

  A new world, and owed a favor.

  Just one more job and Zack Adder could live honestly; just be himself.

  “Now, the job…”

  The old man leaned forward, and suddenly he had a presence about him. Shadows crept over his face, highlighting the whiteness of his eyes.

  “The main thing is that worlds’ Goddess.”

  “Goddess?”

  “Hrmm… yes, the Goddess. She’s been summoning heroes from my world, and others, to her own and sending them on quests.”

  Zack inhaled deeply.

  This was fitting a pattern.

  Kidnapping and coercion.

  This story has been taken without authorization. Report any sightings.

  He had dealt with human trafficking operations before.

  Sadly, not on the side of shutting them down.

  Maybe this time could be different.

  The old man leaned back, and the sense of pressure faded, and a bit of joviality showed on his face. He smiled crookedly.

  “Well, the job is—I want you to go over there and find out what’s going on, and let me know. That’s it.”

  “That’s it?”

  It was the most vague job Zack Adder had ever been assigned.

  “Start with the summoning ritual. Something’s not right. Good luck!”

  There was a blinding flash of light, and the last thought Zack had was that God had never told him how he was supposed to contact God to let Him know anything.

  ***

  My last thoughts before death were football related.

  Man, was that the worst tackle of my life or what?

  There was something about that guy… It was like tackling a tree at full force. He didn’t budge an inch.

  And then the truck hit us.

  Well, that was that.

  No college ball for me.

  But, it wasn’t a bad life.

  I had a blast in high school.

  Made Varsity, won Prom King and Queen with my girlfriend, had tons of friends…

  When I saw that truck swerve, my body reacted before I knew it.

  Some older guy wasn’t paying attention.

  I got a look inside the truck, but…

  From the side, it looked like nobody was at the wheel.

  Did the driver pass out and fall over?

  It was just a glimpse, so I couldn’t be sure.

  Still, boy was I glad I went to Church all the time!

  Because…

  I opened my eyes.

  Heaven.

  Obviously.

  Just look at all the white clouds and white marble and obviously holy light everywhere!

  I guess dying to save someone else counted for a bit, huh?

  I felt myself smile.

  I’m sure my parents would be sad, but…

  Going out like that?

  I’d definitely done the Northcourt name proud.

  Still…

  God’s a total babe, huh?

  I didn’t see that one coming!

  She was seated on a big white and gold throne, with long, flowing blonde hair, and…

  Legs that went on for miles!

  She was wearing these leather sandals, and golden anklets and bracelets…

  I can’t really do it justice, but she was a total bombshell.

  “Ahem, my eyes are up here,” she said, and her voice was simply heavenly.

  Every syllable was uttered with dulcet tones that was, like, wow.

  I looked up, and despite what she said, she was smiling at me with a twinkle in her eye.

  “So, I’m dead, huh.”

  “You died doing a wonderful thing, dear Bradley. To give one’s life for another is the greatest sacrifice one can make…”

  “Aw, geez. I just wish I’d managed to save the other guy.”

  Now, this was weird.

  See, all the clouds were billowing and moving and stuff, in the wind, I guess, right?

  For a second, that all froze.

  Like time had stopped.

  And then it resumed, and the Goddess’ eyes widened.

  “Huh?”

  And she pulled out a computer tablet.

  Through tinny tablet speakers, I heard my own voice.

  “Look out! Move!”

  And the crunch of a truck crashing.

  Then, the tablet was gone.

  “No matter. Your heart was in the right place, and that’s the important thing, Bradley Northcourt. And… I owe you an apology. Your life was not meant to end there.”

  Hang on a second…

  I think I saw a show like this before…

  “Bradley, I must ask much of you. Will you go to another world, and save my people?”

  “Another world?”

  “I believe they are known as ‘isekai’ in your world.”

  “Whoa!”

  The Goddess looked at me pleadingly and forlornly.

  “Please, won’t you save my people?”

  “Of, of course, your grace!”

  The Goddess’ smile then was like the rising of the sun.

  “Please, call me…”

  And so I, Bradley Northcourt, learned the name of God.

  ***

  The next thing Zack Adder knew, he was standing in another heaven, much like the first.

  But, rather than being in the center of the hall lined by marble pillars, he was standing next to one, rising impossibly high into the mists and clouds above. All was wreathed in holy light, so there were no shadows, but he was positioned out of the way.

  Inconspicuous.

  The rich and resonant tones of a woman rang out.

  “O [Hero], save my people. Recover the Holy Sword [Excalibur], defeat the [Demon King], and save my devout followers in the Kingdom of Forti. I have given you my blessing. Seek out the assistance of the Church: they shall aid you in your quest.”

  The blonde man from before—from Earth—was there… also buck naked. But as soon as the voice finished speaking, he glowed and vanished without a trace.

  Zack looked and spotted another throne, this time with a gorgeous young woman seated on it with impeccable regal posture, with honey-gold locks and white robes and gold jewelry.

  She had yet to notice him.

  “Haaahhhhh…” she heaved a great sigh and slouched over to scratch her rear. “Phew, thank goodness this mortal was easy and didn’t demand any crazy cheat skills.”

  Zack stepped out towards the center of the hall, away from the pillar. There were perhaps two dozen yards between them.

  “Uh… Excuse me?” Zack called out to get her attention.

  “KYAAAAAHHHH!!!” the woman screamed, and the entire realm shook. Her eyes darted around, spotted Zack, and she glared harshly in his direction before instantly resuming her prior posture and atmosphere of respectability.

  Zack Adder merely cocked an eyebrow.

  “Ahem,” she cleared her throat, and a graceful expression settled on her face.

  Absolutely captivating.

  “How much of that did you see?”

  “From the part where the guy vanished and you slouched ov—”

  “Please forget you saw that,” she interrupted.

  “Even if you say that…”

  “Please. Forget. You. Saw. That.”

  Her tone brooked no argument, and her eyes were glowing white with divine power despite her elegant smile.

  Zack narrowed his eyes and smiled thinly. “Forget what? I didn’t see anything.”

  The contrast of beauty and threat was intoxicating.

  Once again, Zack Adder was reminded that he had a type.

  “Yes, good.”

  She crossed her legs and looked down her nose at the unexpected intruder.

  Zack attempted a disarming smile. “My name is Zack Adder. May I have the pleasure of your name?”

  She narrowed her eyes. “I am the Goddess Arianna. Now, what are you doing here? How did you arrive in my heaven?”

  The Goddess’ tone was castigating.

  Zack shrugged. “I was hoping you could tell me. The last thing I remember was getting in an accident…”

  The woman pulled out a computer tablet, and gazed at it for some time before looking back and forth between Zack and the screen.

  And, again, she sighed.

  “How did this even happen? Were you trying to get hit by that truck?”

  Zack folded his arms and frowned.

  “Of course not. As you might expect, dying has rather disrupted my plans for the day.”

  Another sigh. “I must have grabbed his soul, too, by mistake…”

  “Mistake?”

  “Soul summoning across realms isn’t as easy as you’d think,” the woman retorted. “Even for a Goddess.”

  “Can you just send me back?”

  Zack thought it was worth a shot.

  After all, if he could just go back…

  “Oh, no no, that’s not happening.”

  “And why not?”

  The Goddess narrowed her eyes at Zack’s tone.

  “Not that it matters to you, but there’s a large difference between pulling a soul into a realm, and pushing into a realm. That is a concern for Gods, not mortals.”

  The secret agent who died and the Goddess of another world glared at each other for a long moment.

  And it was the secret agent who looked away first.

  “So, what now? You’re gonna give me a cheat skill and send me on my way?”

  “No cheat skills!” The refusal was instant and loud.

  “Well, you summoned me, right?”

  Zack wasn’t even thinking about the other God he had met.

  That was already fully compartmentalized, and his current persona had no knowledge of it.

  It wasn’t the only method of lying, but it was the one that worked best for him.

  All the worlds were stages, and Zack Adder had played many roles.

  He was weary of it. And yet, here he was.

  “No! I said no!” the Goddess shouted childishly. “I already spent all that power blessing the [Hero]! There’s nothing left for you!”

  The realm started to tremble, and that ominous white light was filling her eyes again.

  Zack Adder backed off.

  “Alright, alright, fine. No cheat skills, got it.”

  “Good mortal.”

  The Goddess’ full lips curled into a sneer and something about the way she said it really got under Zack’s skin.

  But…

  He suppressed it.

  As annoying as this woman was…

  Now was not the time.

  “Well, it’s not like I can’t give you something. I am a Goddess after all.” The Goddess puffed out her chest proudly, boasting now.

  “Let’s see…”

  Once again, she pulled out the computer tablet and pecked and swiped around.

  And Zack felt his pulse quicken for just a moment before he got control of himself again.

  Was she looking up his digital footprint?

  “Huh?”

  The Goddess’ expression fell into one of confusion as she continued looking into the past of the man named Zack Adder.

  “What the heaven? I’ve never seen a mortal with so little history… Ugh, pulling up the Akashic Record is so much work, though…”

  All the Goddess could find was records of Zack studying: studying in high school, studying information technology and network architecture, studying languages, studying, studying, studying…

  Of course, that was all that existed, now.

  Even before then, much of his life had been classified, and the records encrypted…

  “Whatever, I’ll just let the system handle it.”

  “The what?”

  Zack couldn’t let something that sounded kind of important go without comment.

  “You’ll get skills based on your experiences in life so far, as though you had lived in my world your whole life instead.”

  Zack was speechless for a moment, and the Goddess continued pecking and swiping at the tablet.

  “Hmm, you didn’t do much in your life, did you? Aaaand done. Whelp, I guess that’s it. I’ll be transferring you in at the same time as the [Hero], but I doubt you’ll be able to help him on his quest. At the very least, stay out of his way so he can focus on his fight with the [Demon King]. And don’t expect any help from me, either. I don’t get a lot of information about what’s going on in my realm, given the lack of oracles, so just do your best.”

  Divine presence filled the hall.

  “Be grateful, human mortal! You have received a second chance at life! Do your best not to hinder my chosen [Hero], and praise me all your days! Hahahaha…”

  There was a flash of light, and Zack Adder disappeared.

  This time, the Goddess maintained her posture, looking around in all directions carefully to make sure no other souls had been pulled into her [Hero] summoning. Once she was sure the coast was clear, she slouched over even harder and heaved an even greater sigh than the first time.

  “Haaahhhh… dealing with mortals is so tiring. At least Bradley didn’t ask for stupid cheat skills like reincarnating as a monster or an inanimate object or bringing a smartphone or access to online shopping or even stupider requests like a guaranteed harem or to be wrapped up in some kind of conspiracy.”

  The Goddess heaved one last sigh, and then she herself glowed and vanished, and the heaven in which she’d met the [Hero] and the tag-along ceased to exist.

  ***

  When Zack Adder came back to his senses, he was standing next to the blonde man from the accident and they were both wearing the same clothes as they had back on Earth. Once more he found himself in a throne room, though this one of a much more mundane nature: stone walls and pillars, with tapestries and banners hanging depicting historical scenes and heraldries. In front of them was a throne several steps above the main floor, on which sat a King and next to which stood a woman in white robes with blue trim, and light brown hair.

  And they were both surrounded by armored knights bearing glaives, with swords sheathed on their hips.

  Instantly, the knights lowered their glaives at the two summoned men, save for one, who had foregone a helmet, revealing his face. He yelled at Zack, “Who are you and what are you doing here?!”

  Zack Adder could only sigh.

  Just when I thought I was out, they pulled me back in...