If dying is meaning going to the heavens, then dying and not dying means you are stuck in Hell. Who knew this would ever be an issue? Now I know. And I'm not happy about it and all that time spend in church didn't enlighten me in any way.

  What can I say. I hear my ongoing dialogue in my head as always, just as being alive. I have no body and no sense of physical presence. I went to my own funeral. I wish I didn't, and yet I believe it was the right thing to do. Have you ever had that sobbing little play going in your ind, who will attend my funeral? Tell you what, it's not that great a play to actual witness. I'll leave it at that for now.

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  What else can I say... Well, it's quite overwhelming and there's no manual or way to get short cuts. It's all learning by doing. It's getting easier by time. As of now, I'm able to move around, I call it "fly" and I can listen in on what people are saying to each other. Eavesdropping.I need to figure out how to move things, to be "physical" and such. Its fun at times to be an eye on the wall. It will be more fun when I can manipulate things.