Chapter 57 The Power of Names.

  Your name is a part of who you are.

  A part of your deeds, a part of your truth.

  You’ll only ever want to hide your name,

  if you have done something wrong, or planning to,

  and that is the lie of shame.

  Noxi, Guardian of Light.

  I can think again, the *PAIN*. is gone.

  I sit up. I’m still in the cellar, but there’s no *pain*. I move my left hand, it’s no longer broken, and there’s no *pain* from my ribs either. Even my missing fingers had grown back. I’m healed and rested, only hungry. I’m going to kill them all one day! That hag… that scorpion lady! Balusha! And that shit for brains owl Firuk! They are all dead! I just have to get strong enough…

  My stomach protests. Food first… There isn’t any food in the cellar. I get up and walk around. I don’t expect to be able to stand on my own two feet, and I’m surprised when I realize I feel fine. I can walk easily, I’m not even sore.

  I eye my blood on the stone floor. Magical healing is rather potent… I need to learn how to do such a thing by myself…

  The door opens. Firuk and Balusha enter with a plate of rice floating behind them. “Your name,” Firuk says.

  He’s not very original, is he?

  “Give us your name and you get twenty thousand gems, free morphing, and food. You must be hungry. Refuse, and I give you another dose of raw Akali venom,” Balusha continues.

  I eye her braid and my breath turns rapid, uncontrolled. Focus! Focus! I can’t… no more… I’ll give them the damn name… I…

  No! If I give in now all that pain will have been for nothing! I can’t!

  I can’t go through that again! I…

  I need time to think time…

  “You have one minute to decide,” Firuk says stiffly as if he can hear my thought. Maybe he can hear my thoughts…

  I’m going to kill you all!!!

  Stop this… blind rage doesn’t get me anywhere… It was so painful… I am so tired… I want this to stop… just stop… I could sleep forever now…

  Breathe! A deep breath… there… now, appeal to their reason… I close my eyes and take another deep breath, I can’t help but tremble thinking about that tormenting venom. “Look, I know this is a test. You can torture me forever, it won’t change a thing. I don’t want your gems, the fact you offer me so many gems means my name is worth so much more to you… and there’s no guarantee you’d honor these promises once I say my name out loud. Can we get this over with?”

  They exchange a brief look. “Did you have to tell her it was a test?” Firuk asks her. Phew… they broke the fa?ade… I hope this is over…

  “I didn’t, she figured it out on her own.”

  He looks at her with disbelief. “You’re bad at keeping secrets Balusha, are you sure you didn’t hint at it?”

  She shrugs like it doesn’t matter. “I may have? I really don’t care what the old bitch is playing at. Blame me if you want, you're the only one who cares what she thinks. Let’s call her and finish this nonsense, I’ve got to get back to Gedya, I left Okna and my knights over there.” Phew… it’s over… finally…

  And now they act like it was just another day to them?! YOU ARE ALL DEAD ONCE I GET ENOUGH POWER! I WILL TORTURE YOU AND YOU WILL BEG FOR DEATH! BUT I WON’T GIVE IT TO YOU!

  No… just kill them swiftly… rid the world of monsters like them…

  TORTURE! THEY SHALL KNOW PAIN FOR HARMING THE QUEEN!

  A queen? A queen of what? Just stop this… they’re way beyond my power for the moment…

  Firuk rolls his odd orange eyes, for a brief moment they turn white like they roll into the back of his head. “Can’t you take anything seriously?”

  “Pffff can’t you stop being momma’s boy for a day? Hey, sista, enjoy your rice, you've earned it.” The rice plate floats toward me. I ignore the screaming thoughts in my head. I pick the wooden spoon from the air and inhale the rice from the floating plate.

  Firuk sighs and leaves the cellar.

  Just another day to you, huh? JUST ANOTHER DAY TO ME WHEN I THE QUEEN…

  “Was the torture really necessary?” I ask Balusha, trying to not show the madness in my head.

  She shrugs. “Not my call…”

  “Just doing what the hag tells you to?” JUST ANOTHER DAY TO YOU, HUH? I THE QUEEN WILL ENJOY YOUR SCREAMS!

  “Pretty much. You’re welcome by the way.” She flicks her braid behind her shoulder like its a normal braid and not a deadly torture device.

  WELCOME THE PAIN I THE QUEEN WILL BRING YOU! “What for?”

  “The hints I gave you. I’m better at keeping secrets than Firuk thinks.”

  OH NOW YOU PRETEND TO CARE?! “I see… thanks, but I’d prefer if you didn’t inject me with that Akali whatever that was.”

  This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.

  “Told you, not my call. The old bitch gave this lesson to all of us around the time we reached the 3rd rank apprentice stage. Frankly, it’ll prepare you for what’s out there. There are worse things than Akali venom, and once you give up your name, it’s all over.”

  STOP IT!!! STOP!! STOP! Stop with this queen nonsense! Stop… breathe… enough is enough! I’ll have my revenge eventually… I need patience… wait… did she just say she went through this too?

  “Did the hag torture you as well?” Then how could you do this to me?!

  “It’s more like training to endure torture… And no, she had Kynator do that...” She grimaces. “I’ve been taken by enemy mages once… that was much worse than this… it lasted for weeks… not a pleasant memory. It’s why the old bitch does this… She’s very much into tough love and we’ve all been through her manipulation course. It’ll prepare and train you to face these things when you meet hostile mages at least… The world is a cruel place, the old bitch won't cover it with pixiedust for you.”

  “Why? What’s so important about names that you need to… that you need to train me to endure torture and not give it up?”

  “Best if I let the old bitch show you, she hates it when we involve ourselves with teaching our siblings, and we all have our own children to teach anyway. I’ll see ya around, sista!” She turns on her heel and leaves the cellar, not bothering to close the door behind her.

  Should I go out? Or wait for that old bitch to come here? How far am I going to get? Who cares, by now it doesn’t matter what I do, what is she going to do to me? Torture?

  *tok… tok… tok…*

  Just when I come to a decision to explore, the sound of the hag’s walking stick comes from the corridor.

  The Maven of Mysteries enters the cellar, golden eyes gleaming in the dimlight. There’s no sign of Firuk or Balusha.

  “Was the torture really necessary?” I ask before she opens her mouth. “What kind of mother makes her children torture each other?!”

  Her wrinkles crease when she narrows her eyes at me. “The kind that cares, yes?”

  CARE?! “You psychotic bitch! In what world does making them torture me mean that you care?!”

  “You did not give your name to honey nor venom. You would have eventually. There’s only so much pain any being can endure. I have to admit that your tolerance for pain is higher than any mortal I’ve ever seen. I am genuinely impressed, young woman. You’re the first of my children to successfully endure this course. But even you would have caved in eventually, yes?”

  “What the snake are you getting at?!”

  She circles me slowly, walking stick knocking on the solid stone floor with each step. “If you are ever caught as a prisoner. If you are ever clapped in iron, glass, or jade by hostile mages. This is but a small hint of what you shall be going through, yes? As long as you keep your name to yourself, you are safe. In pain, but safe. Once you give your name away… ***MARISHA*** ta’adii ni se!

  ”

  The order echoes in my body, and something inside my body and soul snaps. I have no control over my movements. I pick the plate and hand it to the hag. What?!

  “Kidra! ” The hag says, her voice giving out an unnatural echo.

  With a drumming heart, my body dances. My hips moves like a common zephyr at the Temple of Koshavi, and my face wash deep red. I have no control over my movements. HOW DARE YOU COMMAND ME?! How the hell…

  So names give absolute control over another person… all you have to do is speak a magical language and you can control someone?!

  “I get the idea, you can stop now,” I say, trying and failing to maintain a calm tone. My voice sounds more fragile than I want it to, tears roll down my cheeks.

  “Takesa! ”

  I can no longer speak, my body keeps on dancing. YOU ARE SO DEAD, YOU BITCH! My body flushes with heat as it keeps dancing in silence. My body no longer listens to me, and I can't even shake in shame and anger.

  “Once you give away your name, you are a true slave, yes? Istasha lahi auzaton le funtis."

  My lips move on their own, and I form the mana patterns without any control over my pools. “Myrsha, nia tsaf lah! Lu myrsha ni kull lah! Nia wuan nalahi myrsha!” “Felul”

  The wind picks me up and I float in place. I gasp for air, panting. Mana being drained from me against my will feels like someone reaches under my clothes and touches my most intimate private parts of my body, like someone unearths all of my most private memories and laughs at my very soul.

  “Not only do you have to follow my order, but I also control your magic. Many strong entities will try and use your names. There are many uses for it, but absolute control is one of the worst. You have nothing to worry about from the gods or the elementals, they have no need for such crude methods. But demons, fae, and other mages will use this against you."

  The hag walks closer and pulls me down to meet her eyes, her eyes glow gold, and her face is close enough to my own that she could kiss me if she wanted. "If you are ever caught as a prisoner, remember this day, remember this moment. Endure the torture, endure the pain. We shall come and rescue you no matter what. We are family, and I do not abandon my children, yes?”

  I land on the ground, suddenly back in control of my own body and magic. “I’d still prefer if you skipped the torture…” I mumble.

  The hag shakes her head in refusal. “You have to know what it’s like. I can’t send you out there unprepared.”

  I nod. I’ll have to disagree… but I didn’t have much of a choice, did I?

  At least it makes sense why she did it… even if I hate her for it… I can understand… I hate that I understand… I just want to hate her… I just want her to be a monster I can hate, I…

  Enough… I need to sleep…

  I sigh. “Do I still get the five hundred gems? Or you never planned to give me those?”

  “kikikiki… of course, chicky, there you go.” Five pouches float toward me.

  From there I go directly to bed, and the world fades into the void.

  *

  {27} Tukado (Janurary) the 25th

  “We have to find a better way to communicate, kid, I’ve been trying to reach you for two weeks. We leave tomorrow at dawn,” Salik says, leaning back in his seat. A few of his mercenaries sleep with their heads on the table, others are engaged in more active pursuits.

  The inn-like Temple of Tonisha is as busy as ever. Fire crackles at the hearth. Men are drinking, smoking, laughing, and singing. Barmaids carrying trays of food under the monstrous statue of the Lady of Ventures.

  “I’m sorry, it wasn’t something I could control…” How do I explain something like: ‘I’ve been kidnaped and tortured by the mage children of an insane psychotic hag who decided that I’m also her daughter.’?

  Salik furrows his thick eyebrows at me. “How about you check with us weekly? I could send the poor kid to the Maven of Mysteries… but your master terrifies him.”

  “Yeah… she terrifies me too…” I’ll kill her! Stop that! “alright, I’ll check weekly. I take Loyal out for a ride around the city anyways. So are we going back to the shimmering tops? What’s the mission?”

  “Sha’ashbash swamps this time. We are to find a carriage that’s gone missing near the swamps. Figured you’d want to join.” Salik’s long fingers circle the mug’s brim.

  “Of course! I could get away from this city for a while, I could use the break…” away from all of this snowy madness…

  “I hear you, kid.”

  An ebony skinned mercenary raises his head from the table. His long unkempt hair sticks to his face in multiple dark strands. “Oh hey, shaman lady!”

  “Um… hi?” I look at the orc with confusion.

  He wakes up another mercenary with an elbow. “Hey *hic* warriors! Ma… Ma… what’s your name again, shaman lady? I *hic* forgot…” The orc gives me a sheepish smile, exposing jagged teeth.

  I blink. What did the hag do to my name? How does something like that even work?! “Inara.” Wait... if she controls me through my name... and she controls what people know. Did I even walk into that shed of her's out of my own free will?! How much control does she even have?!

  “Inara’s here! We *hic* can cut on our camp work tomorrow and drink. Yeah!” he continues.

  It doesn't matter how much control she has, there's nothing I can do about it. My plan remains the same. Get stronger. Go home. And possibly kill the hag if I ever get strong enough to face her and somehow bypass this oath... as for how much control she has, it's only helpful because it'll help me feel like she threatens me...

  “Ahhh… Let me sleep, Noro.” The other guy pushes the orc’s elbow away.

  Salik grins. “See, kid? They’re happy to see you. I didn’t even ask them to be nice.”

  I smile politely, I make sure my unsettling thoughts aren't showing on my face.

  Noro plants his head on the table again. “Yeah… no camp work… a nice redhead shaman does all the work, and I can watch her nice little jugs and…”

  Right… there’s that…

  Salik snickers. “Don’t mind the drunks, kid. I thought your name was Ma… Ma… I’m sorry… what did you say your name was?” He blinks at me and shakes his head.

  What the snake?! How?! How can she do something like that?! What kind of power would someone need to wipe out my names from so many minds?! “Inara.”

  “Ah yes! Inara. Sorry, I’ll make sure not to forget… I’m not so good with names.”

  “M… milady Ma…” Berthold stumbles as he approaches the table, he halts his fall at the last moment, holding onto the table. He raises his head, blue eyes full of anger. “Where were you?! We looked everywhere for you!”

  “What’s it to you?” Why is he angry exactly?

  He trembles visibly and covers his eyes with his wrist. I raise my brows when his voice breaks with tears. “You missed Sorer’s funeral! His wife wanted to see you! He… he…”

  Salik puts a hand on Berthold’s shoulder. “I know you miss Sorer, kid. But people have their businesses, you can’t expect them to always be there. Especially not in our line of work.”

  Right… this is about Sorer… he lost his friend… I know how that feels... I’m tired of that… don’t want to feel anything right now… “I’m sorry, it wasn’t by choice.” I soften my voice. “Why would his wife want to see me of all people? I’m the reason he’s dead…”

  Berthold doesn’t reply. He glares at me, then just turns and leaves, walking away slowly shoulders slumped.

  “You gave them your share,” Salik explains. “Three hundred gold pieces is not a small sum, at least not for the common folk. The woman wanted to thank you personally.”

  “I… I see…” I forgot about that entirely… it may be a large sum for these people… for me, it’s barely pocket money… I should really let loose on my pockets… I’m no longer in any danger of working without pay for five years… That doesn’t mean I should throw money around, I'll never know when I’ll need it…

  “Tomorrow at which gate?” I should pack and get ready to leave…

  “No, we meet here at dawn.”

  “Not the gate?” I raise an eyebrow.

  He snickers and raises his voice above the loud hoarse singing of the men behind him. “Axero requires three days to cross on foot kid. We’ll be leaving with our wagons this time.”

  I cross my hands. “Wagons? Why didn’t we take any the last time?”

  Salik shakes his head. “Good luck climbing a damn snowy mountain with too many wagons, kid. The next thing you know you have a damaged axle, a horse with a broken leg, and a bunch of pissed off mercenaries with extra work to do. Sha’ashbash is different, it’s only plains until the swamps. Once we get to the swamps, we’ll leave the wagons behind under guard and track on foot.”

  “I see… I’ll be here then.”

  *~*~*

  Power level: 3rd stage apprentice.

  Mana pools status:

  Crown-knot: Affinity 10: formed: 1 gem replenished per five minutes.

  Neck-Bridge: Affinity 6: formed: max amount of gems drained per day: 66

  Abdomen-storage: Affinity 5: formed: 6 gems. Conversion ratio: 6:1

  Air: Affinity 4: formed: 18 gems

  Fire: Affinity 2: formed: 9 gems

  Light: Affinity 3: formed: 14 gems

  Water: Affinity 6: formed: 27 gems

  Earth: Affinity 1: formed: 4 gems

  Wood: Affinity 2: formed: 9 gems

  Gravity: Affinity 9: formed: 40/41 gems

  Cantrip known:

  Air: Shavi’s Breeze, Shavi’s Sword. Shavi’s Hair Dryer, Aria’s Enhanced Hearing.

  Fire: Nuriss’ Flame. Effrat’s Firefly, Effrat’s Fire Breath. Sorladika's Lesser Heating.

  Light: Noxi’s Light, Lako’s Blinding Light.

  Water: Water Evocation, Water to Ice, Ice to Water, Water to Vapor, Vapor to Water, Mayan’s Icy Spike, Ayla’s Water Jet.

  Earth:

  Wood:

  Gravity: Lumina’s Kinetic Burst. Tukado’s Repulse. Tukado’s lesser shield. Imari’s Minor Telekinesis. Imari’s Jump. Leo’s Pull. Leo’s Grounding. Alino’s Light Body. Alino’s Heavy Body.

  Spells known:

  Gravity: Alino’s weightless bodyb.

  Focus capability: 11 patterns

  Social status: Inara, Daughter of Mysteries. Apprentice to the Maven of Mysteries.

  Wealth: 1400 gems. 1952 golden peas, 14 silver scales, 20 copper bits.

  Items:

  Magical necklace. Contain a 100 gems of general mana, can be drained like a mana pool. It’ll recharge by itself at the rate of five gems an hour.

  1 simple healing potions.

  1 potion of lightning body.

  1 potion of mana, medium grade.

  An enchanted belt with eight pouches, the enchantment keep the pouches’ content fresh.

  Fresh rose petals, 5g

  Companions:

  Languages:

  Toml’a

  Fluent

  Sinteo Fluent

  Myrsha 5/10

  Felul 1/10

  Injuries and scars:

  Discord for a chat.

  Color map for those who want a reminder what emotion each color represents.

  taytjie for the kind review. <3 Her is still very new, and I have no idea how good it is because there's not much to go on.