"Why, isn't, this, working! Man, this was an excellent streaming opportunity. That story would have gained me so many new followers…" The tiny paper slip lamented from inside Herman’s front shirt pocket.

  "Amm… Slippy…" The man hesitated of how to approach the delicate topic. Though after a few moments of not finding the proper words he just blurted it out.

  "I revoked your streaming service. "A a a ,before you say anything. Aaand, I am sure you do have allot to say on the matter. Have in mind why I did that. We did talk about this, remember?"

  "I..I guess?" The slip hesitantly responded. Trying to remember what the hell was the tyrannical human talking about.

  "You do know that I am in a very vulnerable position? People must not find out who I really am. I, I mean even more than the 3 million or whatever people you already blurted the information to… let's not tempt fate any further, please.

  For example the story I shared with Staple and Topo now, was… well it probably was stupid of me to give details like that, but I guess you can call it a calculated risk between acquaintances…"

  "Eh…” Herman got frustrated at his inability to make any sense without not being a hypocrite himself. "Just… There are certain personal boundaries that we must adhere in civil society. You wouldn't want me sharing with everyone that your SystemX86 file is only 350 lines of code long, would you?"

  GASP! "How did you kno… I mean, I don’t know what you are talking about." The clip said evasively. "But still, I do get your point. Secrets are not to be shared away with outsiders!" The slip said with conviction.

  "I am glad we understand each other." Herman replied, sighing with relief.

  "So can I have my streaming privileges back now?" The slip hopefully inquired.

  Herman squinted his eyes with suspicion at the innocent paper slip in his hand.

  "Weeellll see…" He finally said.

  "Gosh darn it." The slip muttered with frustration, though thankfully did not pursue the matter any further.

  ___

  After the fragile understanding between the AI and the digital human was struck. Both unlikely companions sat in a rare moment of silence, them slowly sipping from the paper straws of their mumbo juice boxes and savoring the taste of the fruity nectar and thinking of what the future might have in store for them. And also contemplating the practicality of having paper straws in a digital world. Not that these things made much difference in the real world to begin with.

  However the serene atmosphere of the inn was not to last.

  Abruptly, the tavern’s double doors flew open, immediately followed by a loud slam as they crashed against the walls. Making Herman tense with anxiety. His mood deteriorating even more as he realized the source of the commotion: People.

  A torrent of humans burst forth from the open doors. All shouting, laughing, screaming, cursing and everything else that mobs did.

  Herman hated mobs. Well maybe the amalgamation of people behind him wasn't a mob per say, but still. Large groups of people always meant trouble, and his experience has taught him to avoid those at all costs.

  As the flow of people kept rushing in, he was rapidly reconsidering his earlier choices, and now wanted nothing more than to just leave. But if he got up now, he would only draw attention to himself and the confrontation would be inevitable. Yes it might have sounded paranoid and antisocial, but Herman hadn't lived to the ripe old age of 140 by ignoring his instincts.

  After a certain point you start to get a sense of how the universe worked. And him standing out as the outsider in an unknown group of humans was just the type of cliches the universe loved to throw around. That is why he remained seated, back to the door, with a hunched downcast posture.

  Next he quickly stuffed the paper slip into his pants pocket. Removing the threat of his companion blurting something out and attracting unwanted attention. He will apologize to the AI later. Now the goal was to blend in with the crowd. He was just another person waiting in the great queue. Nothing more, nothing less. He was invisible, he could not be seen, he was part of the backgrou….

  "Hey you! Hey, baldy! I am talking to you!" A voice rudely interrupted Herman’s pitiful attempts at stealth.

  Then a huge calloused hand landed on the "baldy’s" shoulder.

  Herman closed his eyes and took in a deep, weary breath. He had been through this irritating routine more times than he cared to count. What was it with him attracting the ire of every thug in 10 km radius around him? Was it his glasses? Was he too nerdy? Maybe that is why assholes immediately locked onto him like sharks.

  He could just imagine the impending encounter in his mind:

  1: The asshole will provoke with some absurd accusation.

  2: Herman will deny.

  3: The ape will double down.

  4: Herman will offer to buy him a drink to pacify the brute.

  5: The asshole will say something like “Hey boys, this bla bla thinks he is better than us.”

  6: Pushing and shoving accompanied with puffed out chests while standing on fingertips with your two arms extended wide.

  7: Full fledged brawl.

  Herman had seen and experienced this exact same encounter so many times that he had perfected it into science by now. It was like one of the immutable laws of the universe, right next to gravity and Murphy's law.

  Did you know this story is from Royal Road? Read the official version for free and support the author.

  "Hey! Don’t ignore me, I am talking to you!"

  "Here we go again…" Herman grimly thought as he released the breath he was holding. Clenching his fists, the elderly man turned around to face his brutish opponent. Fully intent on ending things at step 2 rather than wait.

  ___

  Turns out the brute’s name was Jimbo, and he was quite a nice guy when you got to know him.

  He and his gang used to be spaceport workers. Carrying cargo crates around the space docks for years and years till their eventual death during a recent cargo ship explosion.

  Thankfully their union had them covered, so all of them were allowed to live again and retire in Generica Online.

  Jimbo, the leader of the worker gang, was a giant of a man who took pride for his natural “worker” appearance. Apparently he, just like Herman, had chosen to use his original younger body, without any extra avatar modifications. Herman absently wondered if the man had carried all those heavy crates with his bare hands, rather than use cargo lifters like the rest of the mortals beneath him. Hell, the giant could probably juggle cargo lifters in his sleep!

  "Waghaha! Another drink for my comrade Herman!" The giant roared, a big grin on his face. Immediately followed by the cheers of everyone in his work crew. After taking a swig from his huge cardboard box, the man visibly shuttered. "Grghgh! Mumbo juice… I’d sell my soul for a bottle of vodka."

  “No alcohol is allowed in my establishment!” Staple said with a commanding voice from a few tables away, as she carried more mumbo juice boxes to her other customers.

  Completely ignoring her as if she wasn't even there, Jimbo continued. "I am so glad we found you brother Herman! The people of sector 17b of the queue are forever indebted to you. That Fatman and his gang have been terrorizing us hard working people for months. The bastards somehow knew every single rule and law in the book. Always dancing around the restrictions and making everyone's life miserable."

  "But couldn't you jus…." Herman ventured on, but was overshadowed by the boisterous voice of the giant.

  "Oh, I know wat you vil ask. How could such giant of man, a perfect specimen of physical fitness, not just clobber tiny fat man, da?" Jimbo said, his accent slipping.

  "We tried to fight him, but every time we did, we got mass reported. He must have had an exploit or connections." Said a woman from Jimbo’s work gang. The frustration from the situation clearly visible in her face. Others from the work crew sitting around also visibly shared in her feelings.

  "Agrgh, corrupt bastards! I bet he paid someone off to get in here. He probably had the Super Legendary package too. Of course the System would take his side over us hardworking people!" Jimbo scoffed with unrestrained anger!

  "Nah, it doesn't add up. If he had the Super Legendary package, he wouldn't be waiting in the queue with us mortals. Plus I saw his paper slip, it wasn't any different than ours." The woman from before spoke, striking the table with her palm and leaving her copper-colored paper slip there for emphasis.

  "The pig must have had some other exploit up his hoof!" The woman snarled with barely restrained fury.

  Herman blinked a few times at the copper ticket, studying it with curiosity and mentally comparing it to his golden-lined paper slip, the cogwheels in his head slowly rotating.

  "Yeah, I guess you are right Beth." Jimbo said with a contemplative voice.

  "Still, that only makes whatever our new friend Herman did even more extraordinary!" The big man said as he placed a huge palm on the old man’s shoulder and bringing him away from his contemplations.

  "Oh I am nothing special. Plus, I really don’t want to be known as the violent psycho attacking random people in the queue." Herman replied.

  "Don’t be modest man. Intended or not, you did manage to defeat an evil and spiteful person." Jimbo said, hitting both his fists against each other to emphasize his point.

  ___

  After that, the conversation thankfully veered away from the elderly man’s supposed heroics. Jimbo and the work crew shared stories of how it was like living in the queue.

  They offered a plethora of tips and tricks of how to survive in the queue. Ranging from how and where to get good food and entertainment, to discussing the various other groups and gangs in both their sector, as well as the other ones further ahead of the line.

  Turns out the queue wasn't just a bunch of people waiting in line for their turn to enter Generica. Instead, as the queue grew ever longer, so had the people adapted to their new bizarre circumstances. Resulting in smaller tribes and gangs forming all over the length of the great fire wall.

  Eventually, with nearly 10 thousand people in line, the queue had began to develop its own community and traditions. The dry and inhospitable stretch of land squeezed between Generica’s firewalls and the rest of the internet, began to resemble more and more a small settlement, rather than the ragtag group of annoyed individuals it started as.

  Along with the ever rising population of the queue, so did the surrounding infrastructure develop as well. Staple’s inn being the latest example of this effect. It being the last and newest of the evenly spaced taverns embedded at the wall.

  Besides taverns, the queue community had a cinema, a library, various small grocery shops, as well as a newly opened clinic. All in all the area was well on its way of becoming a civilized settlement.

  Of course, not everything was perfect. Just as in every human-dominated society, as the population grew, so did crime. The recent encounter with the Fatman and his gang being not an exception but part of a rising trend in the community.

  Jimbo and his crew advocated the clear need for structure and order. But since they were relatively new and at the back of the line, they were mostly dismissed by the people in the front rows, who profited from the lack of clear order while running their own shady operations.

  Throughout the conversation Herman again found himself at somewhat of a loss. Jimbo, that hulk of a man, had crushed some of his fundamental understandings of how the universe worked. He was supposed to attack and antagonize Herman, not praise and try to befriend him.

  The part of Herman's mind which had developed during his long years surviving in the post apocalyptic wastelands screamed for him to get away from these people. People always meant trouble down the line!

  But another, more optimistic side of his, enjoyed the rising sense of community and kinship. These people weren't evil, and neither were they trying to attack or rob him. They were just hardworking humans wanting a better life for themselves and the community.

  Yes they were a bit judgmental and quick to anger. But nobody was perfect… Hell, Herman wasn't without his issues as well, so he certainly wasn't one that can judge others too harshly.

  Those thoughts and many others passed through his mind as the workers shared more and more information about their new reality. And the old man couldn't help but think that…

  "Perhaps living here wouldn't be so bad after all…"