You'd think after facing primordial nightmares and rebuilding reality, the hardest part of our job would be over. Turns out, trying to organize an interdimensional office party while mysterious gaps in existence threaten everything is surprisingly complicated.
"No, Bob," said Zephyr Nightshade, pinching the bridge of his nose, "we can't serve cheese made from conceptual milk. We talked about this."
"BUT IT'S LACTOSE-FREE!" Bob swirled excitedly. "BECAUSE CONCEPTS DON'T HAVE LACTOSE!"
Luna, still getting used to her enhanced powers, tried not to laugh as she organized party permits across seventeen different dimensional planes. Her golden glow flickered with amusement as another chaos entity tried to convince us that time-loop punch was a good idea.
"Remember when we just had to fight the Void Queen?" said Zephyr Nightshade through our connection to Aria. "That seems easier now."
Aria's predatory grin flashed as she dealt with a minor crisis involving Rex's fur. Apparently, some of the younger chaos entities had tried to make his sparkles play interdimensional disco music.
"MAKE IT STOP!" Rex howled as his fur played what sounded like cosmic jazz fusion. "I can't go to the party looking like a divine dance club!"
"I don't know," Luna mused, her staff creating patterns that somehow made the music sound better, "it has a certain charm."
The Architect materialized, took one look at the chaos, and immediately tried to dematerialize again. Unfortunately, Selene caught him before he could escape.
"Oh no," she said, her ancient power keeping him in place. "If we have to deal with party planning, so do you."
"I created the concept of division itself," he muttered. "How did I end up handling snack arrangements?"
Through the viewing portals, we could see the gaps in reality watching our preparations with what felt like bemused interest. Whatever lurked in those spaces between dreams seemed content to observe our organized chaos for now.
"Maybe they're waiting for an invitation?" said Zephyr Nightshade, only half-joking.
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"SHOULD WE SEND ONE?" Bob asked seriously. "I HAVE CONCEPTUAL CHEESE PLATTERS READY!"
That's when the coffee machine in Dimension 47 decided to achieve consciousness. Again.
"I HAVE ACHIEVED ENLIGHTENMENT THROUGH ESPRESSO," it announced across reality. "ALL SHALL KNOW THE TRUTH OF DARK ROAST!"
"Not this again," said Zephyr Nightshade, our indigo flames already moving to contain the caffeinated revelation. "Luna, didn't you fix this last week?"
"I organized its existence," she corrected, creating new patterns. "I didn't account for it developing a messiah complex about coffee beans."
Aria moved to help, but had to stop to prevent some chaos entities from turning the punch bowl into a portal to what they called the "Party Dimension."
"It's not a real dimension!" she explained for the third time.
"NOT YET," they replied in unison, looking suspiciously innocent.
The coffee machine's enlightenment was spreading, causing other appliances to question their purpose in life. A toaster in Dimension 23 had started a support group for "Misunderstood Kitchen Implements."
"You know what's really concerning?" said Zephyr Nightshade, watching as the coffee machine began writing cosmic poetry in cream patterns. "Some of these existential beverage questions are actually pretty deep."
"'To brew or not to brew, that is the espresso,'" Luna read from the void screens. "It's... actually not bad."
Through our connection, Aria shared a moment of pure exasperation as Bob tried to convince the enlightened coffee machine to cater the party.
"THINK OF THE SYNERGY!" Bob argued. "CONCEPTUAL CHEESE AND ENLIGHTENED COFFEE!"
The gaps in reality seemed to pulse with what felt suspiciously like laughter.
"Great," said Zephyr Nightshade, "even the cosmic mysteries are making fun of us now."
Rex, still sparkling with interdimensional disco, bounded over. "At least the music stopped! Now it's just playing the greatest hits of the universe's creation."
"That's... actually the gaps doing that," Luna noted, studying the patterns. "They seem to be... humming?"
Everyone paused as reality itself vibrated with what sounded like the world's largest cosmic orchestra warming up.
"Please tell me we didn't just inspire whatever's in those gaps to start a band," said Zephyr Nightshade, already dreading the paperwork this would create.
The coffee machine chose that moment to announce its first album: "Grounds for Existence: An Enlightened Brew's Journey."
Bob immediately offered to be its manager.
As chaos entities began designing concert merchandise, Luna's staff pulsed with warning. The gaps were doing more than humming now – they were composing something. Something big.
"Well," said Zephyr Nightshade, watching as reality prepared for what looked like the universe's first battle of the bands, "at least the party won't be boring."
Aria's predatory grin returned full force. "When is it ever?"
The enlightened coffee machine began its first single: "Percolating Through Dimensions of Love."
Even the Architect had to admit it had a catchy beat.
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